Which Came First: The Writer or the Narcissist?

           I consider watching Girls on HBO to be an educational, as well as spiritual, experience for me. Not only does the plot teach me how not to act as a young woman more than a little bit lost in her life (Note: Don’t pee in the street), but the main character, Hannah, teaches me how not to act as a writer. To quote the show’s unlikely voice of reason, Shoshanna, Hannah is a “F*cking narcissist. I’ve never met anyone else who thinks their own life is so f*cking fascinating.” In truth, Hannah’s relationship to her work leads to her believing she has a unique perspective on life that needs to be shared with the world.

            In reality, no one publishes a poem, novel, or blog post without the belief they have something the public needs to hear. The question is: is this belief self-confidence or narcissism? I know I’ve sat through enough cringe-inducing writing workshops, thinking, “God, is this what I sound like to other people?”

Does the process of writing, spending hours documenting and editing your own thoughts, make one a narcissist? Do only narcissists have the bravado to expose their thoughts to the world?

            Or neither?

For starters, most writers are internal processors, meaning that writing is their way of clearing out the mess in their head. In that sense, we don’t think about ourselves or analyze our emotions anymore than regular people. We just process in the more permanent way of documentation.

Writing (as well as reading) is a practice in empathy. When creating fiction, one has to imagine how another person would feel and react to a situation the writer may or may not have experienced before. When creating non-fiction, the writer has to find something in their observations that applies to more universal feelings. But yes, I am a little arrogant to think I can teach the world a lesson about the time I got my ears pierced and there was a guy in the parlor looking for genital accessories (I’ll tell that story later).

Furthermore, I resent the older generations simultaneous obsession with my generation’s exaggerated self-involvement and our low self-esteem. Don’t be a Hannah; accept criticism on your work, pay attention to perspectives other than your own. But acknowledge that you as a writer and a person have something to say. It’s the world's decision whether or not they want to listen.